Fake Horse Names from the Bible
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Posted on
Sat Jun 7th, 2008 - 12:51 am
In honor of the upcoming only-time-any-of-us-even-thinks-about-horse-racing weekend, I’d like to perform a service for creativity-blocked breeders across the country: some help in naming your next winner. To help me help you, I’m turning to that noted inspirational tome, the 8th chapter of 2nd Chronicles in the Old Testament. King James Version, of course.
(Sorry…I can’t help myself.)
Seven Potential Thoroughbred Names Taken Word-for-Word from the 8th Chapter of 2nd Chronicles:
1. Bethhoron the Nether (verse 5)
2. Gates and Bars (verse 5)
3. That Bare Rule (verse 10)
4. Solemn Feasts Three (verse 13)
5. Charges to Praise (verse 14)
6. Eziongeber (verse 17)
7. Fifty Talents of Gold (verse 18)
Enjoy the delicious Belmont Stakes, kids. Go Big Brown.
Hi! I just found your website and it looks great. I always like to read anything on Christians and sports. I’ll have to keep checking it out. Thanks.
June 7th, 2008 at 1:28 pmHey Rena, glad you found the site!
As for the Belmont, I was in Times Square with the family right after the race was run, so that’s where I saw the news that Big Brown crapped the stabled and finished dead last. I was a bit disappointed, but glad I didn’t plan my day around seeing the race.
June 8th, 2008 at 7:26 amI’m not disappointed. Every interview with Big Brown’s jockey made me cringe. What an arrogant guy.
June 8th, 2008 at 3:21 pmJason– that’s the most hillariously disturbing reading scripture ever. Move over “Prayer of Jabez” and “The Bible Code”– now there’s “Hidden Levitical Horse Racing Secrets of the Rich and Pious.”
June 8th, 2008 at 3:24 pm